Many young women have truncated their relationships just before the wedding day; some, after the wedding and it has been observed that their Spouses complain that the woman they married turned out not to be the lady they dated! How is that possible? Well, here are 10 things NOT to do while in Courtship - if you sincerely hope to have a long and happy marriage (that is if you get to the Wedding Day):
1. DO NOT BE HASTY TO BELIEVE WHATEVER YOU HEAR: I once asked a lady why women fall for the same mistake with different men and she said, "The men tell them what they WANT to hear". In as much as you want to hear it, do not be hasty to believe it until you are convinced in your heart and spirit.
2. DO NOT BE QUICK TO GO TO BED WITH HIM: Many women think that the best way to prove their love and loyalty to their man is to go to bed with him. If he cannot wait till after your wedding to bask in the warmth of your loins, then he simply does not love you enough. Many men cheapen a woman because when they asked for sex, it came without much fuss.
3. DO NOT DISCUSS YOUR RELATIONSHIP SECRETS WITH YOUR FRIENDS: There are things which are private and best kept so. If you cannot do it for yourself, do it for the man you claim to love. Many relationships have been broken because the man found out that his secrets are not sacred with his fiancee.
4. DO NOT KEEP SECRETS FROM YOUR FIANCE: If you truly love him, tell him about yourself and tell him every hidden secrets that you have kept to yourself no matter how ugly. If he loves you, he will stay. A broken engagement is better than a broken marriage.
5. DO NOT PRETEND TO BE WHAT YOU ARE NOT: A lady once told me that ladies ALWAYS pretend because it is in their nature to do so in their relationships. That is not so true! Can you keep up the pretence all your life? If your answer is no, then do not start what you cannot finish.
6. DO NOT KEEP ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP BY THE SIDE: Some young ladies have been known to have another relationship on the side in case the one they are focusing on disappoints them. If you do not have enough confidence to keep one, you cannot be sure of the other and once you learn to have divided loyalties, it can follow you into your marriage.
7. DO NOT ALLOW A PAST EXPERIENCE TO NEGATIVELY INFLUENCE THE PRESENT: Every new relationship is a new experience. If you allow yourself to hold on to the hurts of the past, you cannot effectively harness the present in order to enjoy the future.
8. DO NOT RESTRICT YOURSELF FROM EXPRESSING YOUR LOVE: Apart from sex and its appurtenances, express your love in other ways by buying him gifts, calling him to ask about his progress and generally making him feel like the man he is supposed to be in your life.
9. DO NOT WASH YOUR DIRTY LINEN IN PUBLIC: Please, oh! Please, do not engage in arguments with him in public. Express your displeasure but do not overdo it. There are many ways to tell him he has offended you without throwing a public tantrum!
10. DO NOT FORGET GOD: If you are a christian, you know this is the first thing you should hold on to; if you are not a christian, there is need to remember that nothing happens by coincidence. Events have a divine touch behind them and in a world such as ours, there is need to take a stand - for God, or not!
Now, GET CRACKING AT THAT RELATIONSHIP!
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